FSTS - OGR 2

OGR 2 by on Scribd

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  1. OGR 07/02/2019

    Morning Vincent - yep, this is working - and your first pass storyboard communicates clearly with a good range of shots. If I had one observation in terms of staging it would be that in Act 2, you may need to look again at how you're managing two ideas: 1) that time is passing in the underworld and 2) that the alarm is calling Aurora to action. Right now it reads as if she hears the alarm just once, and then she makes her decision, but I think the audience will need to understand that this 'call to action' has been ignored a few times before she takes her decision: I like very much the quick way you're showing the passing of time with the heavier facial hair, but I think you may need some additional moments wherein we see Aurora noticing the alarm sound, but choosing to ignore it, or that Addison hurries her back into the party etc. At the moment, I don't think the audience is experiencing Aurora's 'struggle to do the right thing' - to leave comfort and choose transformation instead?

    In design terms there's plenty of fun to be had here and that's where you need to put your creativity now - I think you need to embrace your design language more fully - really liking the direction of the 'factory world' - and I'm wondering if going for a more bold 'UPA-style' might better suit your characters and your worlds, and I think it would perhaps encourage you to think about your digital painting in some different ways: here's an example of what I mean:

    https://www.pinterest.it/pin/86975836527832690/
    https://www.pinterest.co.uk/htobio/upa/
    https://www.pinterest.com/patcompa/upa-designs/

    You'll notice how it's flat colour and strong line-art, with a sense of the colour sometimes 'escaping' the lines and a sort of freedom - and very simplified characters - so in keeping with your world - and also I think with the implied 'Levittown' 1950s standardisation of your world - this 'UPA' aesthetic was highly popular in the 50s and 60s in terms of animation for commercials and also illustrations in magazines etc. Something to think about - and an opportunity perhaps to think about working between Photoshop and Illustrator in terms of a more graphical look over all?

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